< the bones of april >
#6
Ray your previous poem (It's all about you) nearly induced me to log on to comment, becauseI thought it was so good and if I had still been modding would have put it up for the hog spot - very deserving. But you know...I think I like this one even more because i find it a deeper read.
(I even like the picture which I think has an echo of the layers of images that i get from your poem).

My only comment is I personally like punctuation, but I appreciate the skill that allows you to write without.
Thanks for posting this.
AJ

(07-17-2014, 02:25 PM)rayheinrich Wrote:  



                        [Image: bones.jpg]


                                                < the bones of april >
                                               
                                               
                                                glow white in the moon
                                               
                                                pulling the tides apart
                                               
                                                as i
                                               
                                                your legs
                                               
                                                cast on a beach
                                               
                                                the remnants of old invasions
                                               
                                                picked by crows
                                               
                                                craving this food
                                               
                                                as we all must
                                               
                                                and the water
                                               
                                                and the kiss
                                               
                                                and everything is soon forgotten
                                               
                                                (save the kiss)
                                               
                                                        - - -





Any and all creatively off-topic responses accepted.


Image: "april moons again" - crayola soaked in kerosene
[/size]

Hey the picture has changed whilst I was writing my message...don't like this picture (boring)
Reply


Messages In This Thread
< the bones of april > - by rayheinrich - 07-17-2014, 02:25 PM
RE: < the bones of april > - by billy - 07-17-2014, 03:32 PM
RE: < the bones of april > - by rayheinrich - 07-17-2014, 03:37 PM
RE: < the bones of april > - by billy - 07-17-2014, 03:38 PM
RE: < the bones of april > - by rayheinrich - 07-17-2014, 04:05 PM
RE: < the bones of april > - by billy - 07-17-2014, 06:42 PM
RE: < the bones of april > - by Keith - 07-17-2014, 03:56 PM
RE: < the bones of april > - by cidermaid - 07-17-2014, 04:00 PM
RE: < the bones of april > - by ellajam - 07-17-2014, 09:56 PM
RE: < the bones of april > - by rayheinrich - 07-18-2014, 03:33 AM
RE: < the bones of april > - by newsclippings - 07-18-2014, 07:22 AM
RE: < the bones of april > - by rayheinrich - 07-18-2014, 11:03 AM
RE: < the bones of april > - by newsclippings - 07-18-2014, 11:14 AM
RE: < the bones of april > - by rayheinrich - 07-18-2014, 02:43 PM
RE: < the bones of april > - by billy - 07-18-2014, 04:55 PM
RE: < the bones of april > - by tectak - 07-19-2014, 08:26 AM
RE: < the bones of april > - by rayheinrich - 07-20-2014, 09:25 AM
RE: < the bones of april > - by Achebe - 11-06-2017, 08:36 AM



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