I read Jung once while falling asleep in the cold dawn

[Todd]

Hi Isis, I enjoyed this one. The smooth diction made me trust the speaker. Some notes below:

I read Jung once while falling asleep in the cold dawn


The title sets this up well. We have the speaker's personified seat of creativity and darkness.

My shadow doesn’t need to write things down. Her head
is not a rising tide or a baseball stadium full of drunks. I can’t
keep a grocery list in mine for more than five minutes--This is a good setup for the distracted artist. The creativity knows things is a deep well. The human element is distracted and often overwhelmed by the noise of living. Nice imagery especially building drunks on top of the first rising tide to get a sense of the type of noise and distraction that makes the speaker only somewhat connected to other people. Creativity as a type of functional autism where everything is so loud.

especially not when comparing prices bleached out rows of leeks and oranges--Nice way to convey more language than math based
or trying to remember the names of white flowers now peeking through the branches.--and also conveying less of a scientist in the approach to interacting with the world
This is a point of contention at home where my other half, the human half
and not my shadow, doesn’t realize what he’s missing. Or not missing.No issues so far with content, length of lines, or breaks

My shadow only saunters into the kitchen for tea and knows the weight
of a menu better than a chef’s knife. Other knifes are another story.--the Jungian darkness is back nice line
She doesn’t need to write lists, plans, praises, laments. They come to her
bidden, a pack of wagging dogs:--I don't think you need the repetition of lists here. You have the grocery list earlier. I sort of like the lppl consonant grouping but I think I'd still cut lists.
easily called up and dismissed. I would call them poems

but she calls them talk, the talk we all do when waiting or when
the train lows like a beast, some great sad beast,
perhaps one that has not walked this earth for millions of years.--this is a fantastic sequence. I like the primordial feel of it all. I like the great sad beast. You get the feeling that its the shadow making the observation and conveying it through the noise. If I this were written like a play the human may notice the train lowing. The shadow would then say "like a beast some great sad beast" This reads for me like a conversation of sorts.
She doesn’t think of millions of years or even of yesterday.
This makes conversation difficult.--wonderful aside. The shadow is like benji in sound and the fury.

Her gray hair gets longer and longer but never
appears to tangle or break, even when my whole body has become a tangle
of muscle and reed, a tangle of a million limbs in bed or in the rush;--this is a good contrast. Love the word play. I love the inclusion of reed and limbs giving a subtle organic image compared to something that is alien and not really a part of the world the speaker inhabits.
to get on and off the subway. Her turquoise nails draw--The use of color is interesting. The animal figures below make you think of her nails like a ritual knife or object.
animal figures in the air. She is shades away from becoming--great use of shades here.

an animal, from breaking into storm.--This is an interesting idea too as if the shadows preexisted and pushed the animal drawings to have other hosts. Very nice

At a gathering of gods from places long forgotten she is carrying trays
and bundling white tulips and long grass to give to the leaving, those leaving down
the long and sun-baked steps.--No issues sun-baked steps is a good way to convey an ancient temple. It's the subtle choices I've enjoyed in this one

My shadow pretends she does not need connection to the divine
to the round faces carved thousands of years ago in stone,
but only to the beastly clouds tracking across the sky, in the grass.--Good predator prey imagery with the beastly clouds tracking
She prays beneath the statues and the stained glass.

I have seen her at this, my shadow wearing a robe of red light.

I enjoyed the read. I hope the comments are helpful in some way.

Best,

Todd