06-04-2014, 05:07 AM
If you don't have time for this it's perfectly alright, but could you be more specific about the rough areas? There are certainly parts I like more than others so I'm curious if we think the problems lie in the same places
(06-04-2014, 01:59 AM)rowens Wrote: It has some rough areas. Even if you cleaned them up, it would still be a typical street poet poem. The people that read in front of open mikes all over the country and sound the same.
If you slowed down with the rhymes and other effects and worked out something original, or at least more original ways to say things, it would probably come out better.
I write what I see. Write to make it right, don't like where I be. I'd like to make it like the sights on TV. Quite the great life, so nice and easy.