Winds of the Seasons An attempt at Trochaic Tetrameter with Trochaic Trimeter

[Erthona]

There are a number of syllables that can be read as stressed or unstressed, most I gave the benefit of the doubt, however some I left un-bold to point out the weakness of the line. Such as "Through the canyon rock it screams" the last four syllables read as neutral to me, that is one does not seem more stressed than the other. I'm not saying it could not be read as trochee, I am just saying it could be read as all non-stressed. You are not alternating tetrameter and trimeter. It reads as tetrameter-trimeter-tetrameter-tetrameter-tetrameter-trimeter. Which is kind of odd with the xyxy rhyme pattern. This poem starts out as though in common meter, but only in trochee instead of iambs, but then instead of alternating the lines the third line, where one would expect a line of trimeter, one finds a line of tetrameter. I'm not saying there is anything wrong with doing so, however it does make it more difficult getting into the rhythm of the poem, and I think one should consider the rationale for doing so. Below is how I read/scan the stressed/non-stressed syllables, the stressed syllables in bold.

In terms of the content, the first two stanzas seems like a sea shantey, in content if not so much in form. However, the third stanza seems unlike the first two, although I understand you are talking about the wind, you have tied it too much to the environment, making that the focus rather than the wind itself.

Dale


Rag ing winds took ship and lives,
prompts the poet's rhymes.
Singing to lost sailor's wives;
Songs proclaiming; "hope survives".
Warm winds blow and spring arrives,
life and better times.

Cooling brow, sweet summer breeze,
comfort for us all.
Unseen fingers through the trees;
Sways tree branch and rustles leaves.
Morning frost upon the sheaves,
early feel of fall.

Through the canyon rock it screams,
forcing snow to fly.
Gale winds paint the winter's theme;
Waving aspen's golden sheen,
valley down below agleam,
up above, blue sky.