05-12-2014, 05:24 AM
One more small change. Hopefully if moves it from descriptive piece (albeit sans sufficient articles) to creating a small intimate moment. Thanks for everyone's suggestions.
98.6, I laugh.
your touch is
much warmer
than that.
the grace of your hand,
fresh from sunrise gardening,
tucks strawberry & blonde curls
from strong café eyes.
the cut of your tongue,
the breath from your lips.
how could I help myself
-------------
98.6, I laugh.
your touch is
much warmer
than that.
the grace of your hand,
tucks strawberry & blonde curls
from sharp amber eyes.
the cut of your tongue,
the breath from your lips.
kiss.
how could I help myself?
---------------
98.6, I laugh
your touch is
much warmer
than that
soft slender of your neck
respite in the small of your back
grace of your hand
tuck strawberry & blonde curls
from fiery keen eyes
breath from your lips
the cut of your tongue
how could I help myself
-romantic poetry is way outside my wheelhouse, thoughts suggestions appreciated.
98.6, I laugh.
your touch is
much warmer
than that.
the grace of your hand,
fresh from sunrise gardening,
tucks strawberry & blonde curls
from strong café eyes.
the cut of your tongue,
the breath from your lips.
how could I help myself
-------------
98.6, I laugh.
your touch is
much warmer
than that.
the grace of your hand,
tucks strawberry & blonde curls
from sharp amber eyes.
the cut of your tongue,
the breath from your lips.
kiss.
how could I help myself?
---------------
98.6, I laugh
your touch is
much warmer
than that
soft slender of your neck
respite in the small of your back
grace of your hand
tuck strawberry & blonde curls
from fiery keen eyes
breath from your lips
the cut of your tongue
how could I help myself
-romantic poetry is way outside my wheelhouse, thoughts suggestions appreciated.