Pipe Dream
#8
(05-08-2014, 09:54 PM)benno_422 Wrote:  Pipe Dream:

The badlands are split
along the spine of
an anchor cast

so iron centipedes
could chase their
dead frontiers -

they run faster than
their arms can grab.

-

what meekness
remains is hollowed
in the trunk

of a horn blare
bushes fainting in
the mad rush

until everything
could only grow
pretending as if

they dreamed to
be degenerate
skyscrapers.
I was thrown by this piece. I read "pipe dream", "badlands" (even with no caps), "iron centipede" and immediately thought keystone XL pipeline and heavy crude. I'm not sure if you're in the US, but if so, wider context matters. I think the reader gets the sense of the natural world being undermined, but with anthropomorphisation it's hard to see why or how.

I like the flow of the piece and the rythem a lot. I think it needs to be boiled way down and focused. Thanks for the read.
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Messages In This Thread
Pipe Dream - by benno_422 - 05-08-2014, 09:54 PM
RE: Pipe Dream - by kindofahippy - 05-09-2014, 12:14 AM
RE: Pipe Dream - by benno_422 - 05-10-2014, 07:28 AM
RE: Pipe Dream - by Erthona - 05-10-2014, 08:11 AM
RE: Pipe Dream - by benno_422 - 05-10-2014, 10:30 AM
RE: Pipe Dream - by Eugene_Moon - 05-11-2014, 02:58 AM
RE: Pipe Dream - by Martyl - 05-11-2014, 03:43 AM
RE: Pipe Dream - by bbcashdollar - 05-11-2014, 09:57 PM
RE: Pipe Dream - by SuicidalBlueJay - 05-12-2014, 11:09 PM
RE: Pipe Dream - by benno_422 - 05-13-2014, 08:49 AM
RE: Pipe Dream - by Babeanew - 05-14-2014, 07:50 AM
RE: Pipe Dream - by olive_morphia - 05-29-2014, 11:45 PM
RE: Pipe Dream - by Isis - 06-02-2014, 02:25 AM
RE: Pipe Dream - by bena - 06-02-2014, 05:46 AM
RE: Pipe Dream - by Tiger the Lion - 06-02-2014, 06:18 AM
RE: Pipe Dream - by hydroguy - 06-03-2014, 02:38 PM
RE: Pipe Dream - by Sachelcharges - 06-03-2014, 05:13 PM



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