Lower Crust

[Markworth]

I enjoyed this greatly, thanks so much for sharing.

I generally don't experience sweat dripping off the chin, maybe the brow, or the nose if I'm really hot. Maybe it's so hot on that gravel road that sweat is dripping from everywhere!

The last stanza says volumes in just 8 words. Very nice!

Edit 1
Mangled hair, worn leather boots,
ripped denim jeans, with a
red bandanna under a
feathered fedora.

He sips coffee stationed
on a stool, speaking tales
of far away places.
Where dreamers visit.

Alluring encounters entice,
Fire flies dancing in the
heat, illuminating
a pond filled with cattail.

Walking on gravel roads
in the summer sun.
Sweat streams down
dripping off the chin.

Wandering with no aim.
A train with no passengers
purposely patrolling endless
landscapes.

Overhearing the youth
from the table behind.
An overhearing ear.
Sits silently alone.

Black suit strapped to
a pale chest, glasses,
polished dress shoes,
a matching laptop.

Gazing upon his screen,
stocks tell him of a
growing number.
His life's work.

Breathing deep the
suit strapped soul
sighs silently.




Original

Mangled hair, worn leather boots,
ripped denim jeans, with a
red bandanna under a
feathered fedora.

He sips coffee stationed
on a stool, speaking tales
of far away places.
Where dreamers visit.

Intriguing, his stories seem.
Fire flies dancing in the
summer heat, illuminating
a pond filled with cattail.

Walking on gravel roads
in the warm summer sun.
Sweat streams down
dripping off the chin.

Wandering with no aim.
A train with no passengers
purposely patrolling endless
landscapes.

Overhearing the youth
from the table behind.
Resides the antithesis
of the story teller.

Black suit strapped to
a pale chest, glasses,
polished dress shoes,
a matching laptop.

He stares upon his screen,
stocks tell him of a
growing number.
His life's work.

Breathing deep the
suit strapped soul
sighs silently.