Henry's Room

[poe]

Hello,

I've been writing poetry for the past week and would appreciate thoughts on this one. I'm also open to providing my thoughts for the poems of others, as I realize this is essential for this type of forum.

Henry's Room (at Walden Pond)

Dare not did I step into Henry’s room
Was marked out by the stones beneath the trees
With chains that linked the stones except for two

His footsteps there were footsteps not for me
Perhaps I would if Henry was still here
Then two would make much better company

I walked around the edge so very near
Around the bricks where heat did once pass through
Back to the front where chains did not appear

And there I stopped and did enjoy the view
Dare not did I step into Henry’s room

Hello Mark,

I find "Henry's Room" compelling as a poem. Although I'm not always sure about what is going on there. In particular I don't know what is meant by the "chains" in stanza 1, L3, or in stanza 3, L3.
As for stanza 1, L1 " I did not dare step into Henry's room.." or,"I dared not step into Henry's room..",or "I didn't dare step into Henry's room.." may be more natural sounding than "Dare not did I step into Henry's room." A poem needn't sound unnatural syntactically.
I like the physicality of the poem, such as descriptions of the environment, temperature, or the lack there of, stanza 3, L2. The physical descriptions interface nicely with the writers intentions (the first and last lines) suggesting profound (but never syrupy)emotion.

Nice work
TS