An Old Mans Memory.

[billy]

for me it's too wordy cut, and keep the the parts that show us something of your memory, don't keep the parts that tell us something of them.
the title tells us what the poems all about so no need for "when i were a lad" etc.

An Old Mans Memory.
I remember the times when I was happy.
When I could be free with my words. use [was]
A time that felt more alive. [that lived]

and then the 1st line of 2nd really adds very little and each line thereafter is likewise loaded with filler.

I remember the times when I was happy.
When I could be free with my words.
A time that felt more alive.

In that time lived a young man.
Who saw the world with bright eyes.
The air was crisp, and my steps moved in straight lines. this line works though air crisp is cliche. this line isn't just fluff. it actually shows us something.

I use to smile then.
My voice was full of laughter.
Every where I went my libido would follow after.

I was brave.
There was no fear in me.
I was young, and foolish to think I could live forever.

I look at those times when I ruled the world.
It brings a smile to these cracked lips and wrinkled cheeks.
My blurry eyes drop a few tears in remembrance of forgotten years.