04-09-2014, 04:40 AM
Carousal Wrote: I wonder if those who seem content with Hollywood mangling of history would be so happy, if the British film industry (Yeah we still have one) made a movie of the Alamo where all the defenders had it away on their toes before the first shots were fired, leaving Boadicea and her Amazons (All at a reasonable price) charging to the rescue and saving America’s arse, the final credits rolling to the sound of Rule Britannia.
I thought that was how it happened. How else did Sam Houston know to come to a knife fight with a cannon, unless General Pakenham told him?
excerpt from History channel, "Great Moments In History"
In 1814, General Edward (Eddie) Pakenham took back the town of New Orleans from the Yanks, and after securing it's borders by refortifying the poles with plenty of Union Jacks, and refortifying the populace with a goodly supply of Panama Jack, which took approximately 22 years as he had to verify that the "tea" was up to British standards, he then set sail for Texas in 1836, and arrived just in time rescue the the motley crew of doctors, lawyers, and former ex-pat Yank congressmen (Davy Crockett), as well as the more respectable Texican scum. Having stalled Santa Anna's army almost single-handedly by rolling barrels of Panama Jack to the opposing army, he secured the small fort and then sent word to General Sam Houston (who was lounging somewhere else, completely unaware that the country of Texas was being invaded), to come and beat Santa Anna with his own leg, (which the Texicans had captured in a previous battle). The Mexican army was easily defeated at the battle of Battle of San Jacinto (which was a river of sorts 150 mules away) as they were all stoned off their asses, and since they had no horses (only donkeys), they could not mount a charge or much of anything else. General Sammy and General Eddie (the two of which were founding members in the rock group Van Halen) took turns beating sissy pants (Santa Anna) with his own leg, until he agreed to pay 1.5 million for Eddie's weed that his army had smoked up, and 15 million to the great country of Texas to write a constirtushun,and other such laws as, "that you can shoot an Indian if you see him crossing the Red River after sundown", "a person can be hang if caught with wire-cutters in his back pocket", and of course one of the foundation laws of all great demon-accuracies, "that if you catch your wife in bed with another man doing the nasty, you can shoot both with impunity, or whatever firearm is handy"!
Since that time the British peoples and the Texican peoples have been great friends and have joined together in their effort to prevent the unmitigated spread and growth of the American (Yanks) Hegemony. God save the Queen!
I thought that was how it happened. How else did Sam Houston know to come to a knife fight with a cannon, unless General Pakenham told him?
excerpt from History channel, "Great Moments In History"
In 1814, General Edward (Eddie) Pakenham took back the town of New Orleans from the Yanks, and after securing it's borders by refortifying the poles with plenty of Union Jacks, and refortifying the populace with a goodly supply of Panama Jack, which took approximately 22 years as he had to verify that the "tea" was up to British standards, he then set sail for Texas in 1836, and arrived just in time rescue the the motley crew of doctors, lawyers, and former ex-pat Yank congressmen (Davy Crockett), as well as the more respectable Texican scum. Having stalled Santa Anna's army almost single-handedly by rolling barrels of Panama Jack to the opposing army, he secured the small fort and then sent word to General Sam Houston (who was lounging somewhere else, completely unaware that the country of Texas was being invaded), to come and beat Santa Anna with his own leg, (which the Texicans had captured in a previous battle). The Mexican army was easily defeated at the battle of Battle of San Jacinto (which was a river of sorts 150 mules away) as they were all stoned off their asses, and since they had no horses (only donkeys), they could not mount a charge or much of anything else. General Sammy and General Eddie (the two of which were founding members in the rock group Van Halen) took turns beating sissy pants (Santa Anna) with his own leg, until he agreed to pay 1.5 million for Eddie's weed that his army had smoked up, and 15 million to the great country of Texas to write a constirtushun,and other such laws as, "that you can shoot an Indian if you see him crossing the Red River after sundown", "a person can be hang if caught with wire-cutters in his back pocket", and of course one of the foundation laws of all great demon-accuracies, "that if you catch your wife in bed with another man doing the nasty, you can shoot both with impunity, or whatever firearm is handy"!
Since that time the British peoples and the Texican peoples have been great friends and have joined together in their effort to prevent the unmitigated spread and growth of the American (Yanks) Hegemony. God save the Queen!
How long after picking up the brush, the first masterpiece?
The goal is not to obfuscate that which is clear, but make clear that which isn't.
The goal is not to obfuscate that which is clear, but make clear that which isn't.