Coming of Age, Again (Give an Inch) edit #4.1

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Coming of Age, Again (Give an Inch) edit #4.1

ellajam Offline

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#24

01-26-2014, 10:51 PM

(01-26-2014, 12:36 AM)milo Wrote:
(01-26-2014, 12:33 AM)ellajam Wrote:
(01-26-2014, 12:15 AM)milo Wrote: Just a quick note that meant to make on v1 but forgot - the double "with s" aren't working, maybe hair an sex?
Thanks, I've gone back and forth, I'll try and.
Alternatively - what is the bond of hair with sex

(Though I would prefer ad in that line too)

I like the conversational tone in the hair/sex line, but I'll think on whether or not it weakens the poem.

billy wrote:welcome to the site. make it your own, wear it like a well loved slipper and wear it out. ella pleads:please click forum titles for posting guidelines, important threads. New poet? Try Poetic DevicesandWard's Tips

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Messages In This Thread

Coming of Age, Again (Give an Inch) edit #4.1 - by ellajam - 01-22-2014, 11:37 PM

RE: Silver Sonnet - by Erthona - 01-23-2014, 12:26 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet - by ellajam - 01-23-2014, 01:00 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet - by ThePinsir - 01-23-2014, 01:20 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet - by ellajam - 01-23-2014, 01:49 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet - by milo - 01-23-2014, 02:41 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet - by Dru Flores - 01-23-2014, 02:00 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet - by ellajam - 01-23-2014, 07:28 PM

RE: Silver Sonnet - by Leanne - 01-23-2014, 04:15 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet - by ThePinsir - 01-23-2014, 05:21 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet - by ellajam - 01-23-2014, 05:53 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet - by milo - 01-24-2014, 11:34 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet - by ellajam - 01-24-2014, 07:14 PM

RE: Silver Sonnet - by milo - 01-24-2014, 11:30 PM

RE: Silver Sonnet - by ellajam - 01-25-2014, 12:20 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet - by milo - 01-25-2014, 12:32 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet - by ellajam - 01-25-2014, 12:58 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet - by newsclippings - 01-25-2014, 01:10 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet - by ellajam - 01-25-2014, 01:17 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet edit #1 - by ellajam - 01-26-2014, 12:11 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet edit #1 - by milo - 01-26-2014, 12:15 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet edit #1 - by ellajam - 01-26-2014, 12:33 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet edit #1 - by milo - 01-26-2014, 12:36 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet edit #1 - by ellajam - 01-26-2014, 10:51 PM

RE: Silver Sonnet edit #1 - by abu nuwas - 01-28-2014, 08:26 AM

RE: Silver Sonnet edit #1 - by ellajam - 01-28-2014, 09:53 AM

RE: Silver and Bold edit #1 - by milo - 01-28-2014, 10:15 AM

RE: Silver and Bold edit #1 - by ellajam - 01-28-2014, 11:14 AM

RE: Silver and Bold edit #1 - by milo - 01-28-2014, 11:29 AM

RE: Silver and Bold edit #1 - by trueenigma - 01-28-2014, 10:53 AM

RE: Silver and Bold edit #1 - by ellajam - 01-28-2014, 12:02 PM

RE: Silver and Bold edit #1 - by trueenigma - 01-28-2014, 03:04 PM

RE: Silver and Bold edit #1 - by justcloudy - 01-28-2014, 07:27 PM

RE: Silver and Bold edit #1 - by ellajam - 01-28-2014, 07:46 PM

RE: Give an Inch...(Silver Sonnet)edit #2 - by trueenigma - 01-29-2014, 08:51 AM

RE: Give an Inch...(Silver Sonnet)edit #2 - by ellajam - 01-29-2014, 09:37 AM

RE: Give an Inch...(Silver Sonnet)edit #2 - by justcloudy - 01-29-2014, 10:09 AM

RE: Give an Inch...(Silver Sonnet)edit #2 - by billy - 01-29-2014, 10:24 AM

RE: Give an Inch...(Silver Sonnet)edit #2 - by ellajam - 01-29-2014, 10:34 AM

RE: Give an Inch...(Silver Sonnet)edit #2 - by newsclippings - 01-31-2014, 06:13 AM

RE: Give an Inch...(Silver Sonnet)edit #2 - by ellajam - 01-31-2014, 10:13 AM

RE: Give an Inch...(Silver Sonnet)edit #2 - by billy - 01-31-2014, 11:59 AM

RE: Give an Inch...(Silver Sonnet)edit #2 - by ellajam - 01-31-2014, 07:14 PM

RE: Give an Inch...(Silver Sonnet)edit #2 - by justcloudy - 01-31-2014, 06:57 AM

RE: Give an Inch...(Silver Sonnet)edit #2 - by newsclippings - 01-31-2014, 05:56 PM

RE: Give an Inch...edit #4 - by ellajam - 09-17-2015, 11:01 AM

RE: Give an Inch...edit #4 - by milo - 09-17-2015, 12:54 PM

RE: Give an Inch...edit #4 - by ellajam - 09-19-2015, 10:42 PM

RE: Give an Inch...edit #4 - by QDeathstar - 09-19-2015, 10:54 PM

RE: Give an Inch...edit #4 - by ellajam - 09-19-2015, 11:16 PM

RE: Give an Inch...edit #4 - by QDeathstar - 09-19-2015, 11:53 PM

RE: Give an Inch...edit #4 - by ellajam - 09-20-2015, 12:28 AM

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