01-23-2014, 04:15 AM
Call it a rock'n'roll sonnet and be done with it 
. Iambic pentameter is just the most common meter, not a hard-and-fast rule. I've written them in tetrameter as well, and one of my favourite meters to write in is iambic heptameter. This has still got the feel of a sonnet (although it's true that you don't need to call sonnets "sonnets" and that shuts everyone up 
).
I think the last line should probably be "rising" instead of "rises", and to properly encapsulate the couplet, you might want to stick a colon at the end of L12. It's great fun though, with a good dose of irony.
. Iambic pentameter is just the most common meter, not a hard-and-fast rule. I've written them in tetrameter as well, and one of my favourite meters to write in is iambic heptameter. This has still got the feel of a sonnet (although it's true that you don't need to call sonnets "sonnets" and that shuts everyone up ).I think the last line should probably be "rising" instead of "rises", and to properly encapsulate the couplet, you might want to stick a colon at the end of L12. It's great fun though, with a good dose of irony.
It could be worse