01-23-2014, 01:05 AM
I listened to "Kikapoo" by Tenacious-D and wanted to write a silly poem about killing a Dragon. I typically only write sonnets, so here ya go.
The Dragon
Before or since I've never felt as brave
as when the hellish mountain I explored.
I traveled far and wide to seek reward:
the rumored riches which the Dragons crave!
I ventured forth into the Dragon's cave
to slay the beast and steal the treasure hoard.
I snuck behind the tail, unsheathed my sword,
prepared to send the Dragon to its grave!
But then I saw the treasure wasn't vast,
but only that his cock and balls were gold!
I swung my shiny sword and severed swift
the Dragon's golden dong and darted fast!
A scale-y, golden phallus to behold
will make the perfect lady's Yuletide gift!
The Dragon
Before or since I've never felt as brave
as when the hellish mountain I explored.
I traveled far and wide to seek reward:
the rumored riches which the Dragons crave!
I ventured forth into the Dragon's cave
to slay the beast and steal the treasure hoard.
I snuck behind the tail, unsheathed my sword,
prepared to send the Dragon to its grave!
But then I saw the treasure wasn't vast,
but only that his cock and balls were gold!
I swung my shiny sword and severed swift
the Dragon's golden dong and darted fast!
A scale-y, golden phallus to behold
will make the perfect lady's Yuletide gift!
My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings:
Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!
Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!