Seraph's cry

[heslopian]

Day time city streets;
Angles hide in plain sight. Do you mean "angels", or are you referring to the angles of buildings?
The sun shines and
springs back from seraphim wings. I like the action in this line. It makes the sun seem like a capricious fairy.
Chins tucked into their who? coats as
they fight against a bitter wind.
Gales of change and fleeting times,
Their time has past.
They pace forlorn,
and through city streets they walk.
Too afraid to fly.
So afraid to die.


Gabriel's sore throat will tell you,
Life was not always so hard for them .
Their days have grown long and cold,
Their feathers plucked and children told:
This world so strange
Inspires change
But our minds are old,
Our souls too cold for this place. I like the internal rhyme here.
You, my son, my daughter...
Must face our fears and fly.
Let tears fall in the dust, Is this comma needed? These otherwise excellent closing lines would be much stronger without them, I think.
From a seraphim sky.

A bit more clarity's needed, I think, in regards to who the poem's about, and maybe some more urban imagery might justify your opening line and allusions elsewhere to cityscapes, but I liked this one. It was potent and lyrical, in its way. Thank you for the read