L-O-V-E in the Crossword (second edit)

[justcloudy]

Wow huge difference with the edit, nicely done. It's much more accessible to this non-crossword-doer. It tells the story beautifully now, the first draft was a bit too vague. The paragraph breaks (how do we call those empty lines in poet-speak?) are well done, though they were a little distracting at first they add a lot the second/third time around.

My only critique would be the penultimate line... it looks awkward as it is. Maybe write "d" in quotes (and getting rid of the quotes around "desire") or capitalize it? It's just a nit but it bugs me.

Thanks for the read and the fine editing job!

-justcloudy