To: All the Girls

[billy]

there feels to be a lot of regret in the poem.
i'm on the fence as to whether i like it or not but that's a good thing i think, it sets the reader to actually think about the poem.
after reading it a few times i'm coming down on the side of liking. it's a POV of womanhood that is often missed in all the lovey dovey stuff
at most i think it needs a smallish edit to make it pop just that bit more

thanks for the read.

To all the girls here i'd let the title do it's work instead of it showing twice.
Tight skinned
Primed; ripe and ready
Teeth: white
Straight eyed
We equal, yet I find you more than me, we makes this line seem like african american, i don't see that elsewhere in the poem, would [we're] be more apt?
Everywhere, dazzling
Twinkling, before me
Whatever will we do, when the gazes fade?
Like yesterdays headliner, damp, tattered on the pavement did you mean headline/s?
All the strife and worry put upon the ripe fruit is [all the] needed?
Hands anticipating with mouths open, ready for the reaping the 2nd ready doesn't add anything really is there another [r] word that could be used?
Only and always to fall, rolling down the hill
Forgot and left to rot i'd suggest putting this and the line above in their own space as it's a big turning point in the poem.
So to all the girls
Primped and pearly
Pure; picked and open
Skin: soft and naked
Eyes: wrought and sunken
Never mind the world or the hopes it beholds is this line needed, it feels to be the weakest of poem and a bit wordy
Your fire: volcanic and teeming
Since birth and oblivion
Time will show the cracks and burns
And the dysmorphic body turns i like the movement and unwanted growth this line conveys.