Sleeper

[Leanne]

I’m ready to sleep in the dark now
My arm stretched out behind me
Finger perched and poised on the light switch
Half-crouched, on my mark
Memorizing the unobstructed route
Before I sprint blindly to the twin-size berth -- would just "twin berth" work here?

I like to sleep in a cold room
So I can be reminded of what I’m protected from -- this line is quite awkward -- I can't think of a suggestion immediately though, sorry
What I really should be scared of:
Homelessness, giving every thought to endurance
Friendless to where I cannot afford to put trust on hold
Forgettable, faceless, although easily identifiable to where my survival
May bring about incarceration should I decide to sustain myself
Through illicit means -- this stanza is full of quite a lot of "tell" rather than "show" -- I would like to see you condense this and come up with some concrete images rather than outright statements, as a lot of this can be implied

For now, a comfortable cold bed in the dark
Easy dreaming there
Easily able to scoff the nightmare prickle
No conclusions made that my uproarious snore is the mark of a rummy -- another line that could be "show" rather than "tell"
For now, there's an optimism that I’m willing to take on at arm's length
A plugged-nosed repose I don’t have to answer for
A boisterous in-the-dark thinker
A move-along-nothing-to-see-here sleeper -- I really like these last two lines, both the sound of them and the ideas.

This is a great concept that with some fine tuning could turn into a really good piece of poetry. It does suffer a bit from a heavy touch but that's just something that comes with practise. I look forward to seeing what becomes of this poem.