Dying to Live

[Simatong]

The void speaks the names of the ruined, of the spiritually deceased who have yet to rise from oblivion's grave.
redundant. oblivion is a stand-alone & self-explanatory
They stand, vexed by turmoil, and reach out to the heavens for a reprieve that is not their's to have.
'stand' is weak, try 'rise' or 'answer' instead. don't think you really need 'by turmoil'. not liking 'reach out to the heavens' - either 'reach out to heaven' or 'reach to the heavens'. economize. 'their's to have' no-no. no apostrophe, no 'to have'
They walk among us, draped in the garb of kings that smell of sweet perfume, adorning the world with saintly smiles that few would think to question.
omit 'think to'
Yet one need only look passed the mirage of flesh to see a naked soul trembling in a darkness they themselves created, the soul that they deny and never speak of but whom their broken hearts mourn.
'passed' no, 'past' yes. 'they themselves' no - either remove 'themselves' or change syntax, i.e., 'they created themselves'. incorrect usage of 'whom' - research this.
Their soul reeks of decay, a stench that rises and stings the nostrils as sweet perfume, with cries of anguish that echo through the halls as laughter. make 'soul' plural, you are speaking of more than one. also, you've already used 'sweet perfume' to describe the kingly garb.
No one knows what rots on the inside, what becomes more and more a hollowed shell. But this is the price that many men pay to be adored by their kin, to have the light of suns themselves kiss their feet. Let them kill the spirit that the gods afford them, for what greater men exist in this world than those dying to live?

No mas, I'm exhausted. May I suggest that you proofread a tad more? It's an interesting (albeit morose) abstraction that deserves cleaner execution (no pun intended). Choose your own words, but please consider the commentary. Wax on, wax off. Thanks for the read.

Thank you for the commentary
1) You are correct when it comes to "their's". I will make not of that and change it, though "theirs to have" felt better to me
2) Your comment on "passed" and "past" is noted, and I will change it.
3) Nothing ungrammatical about "they themselves". Using those two words together is a form of emphasis that I like.
4) Your comment on "whom" has been noted and the word will be changed.
5) I will leave "soul" singular and just fix one or two words to make it all sound singular.
Thank you for your input.

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My husband, who is an utter and total non-poet, saw this and said "maybe we should take each line, summarize it, and then it'd be more of a poem..."

I tend to agree...

Good to know

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The void speaks the name of the ruined, of the spiritually deceased who have yet to rise from oblivion's grave.
They stand, vexed by turmoil, and reach out to the heavens for a reprieve that is not theirs to have.
They walk among us, draped in the garb of kings that that carry the scent of prestige, adorning the world with saintly smiles that few would think to question.
Yet one need only look passed the mirage of flesh to see a naked soul trembling in a darkness they themselves created, the soul that they deny and never speak of but who their broken hearts mourn.
Their soul reeks of decay, a stench that rises and stings the nostrils as , with cries of anguish that echo through the halls as laughter. No one knows what rots on the inside, what becomes more and more a hollowed shell. But this is the price that many men pay to be adored by their kin, to have the light of suns themselves kiss their feet. Let them kill the spirit that the gods afford them, for what greater men exist in this world than those dying to live?

The void speaks the names of the ruined, of the spiritually deceased who have yet to rise from oblivion's grave.
They stand, vexed by turmoil, and reach out to the heavens for a reprieve that is not their's to have.
They walk among us, draped in the garb of kings that smell of sweet perfume, adorning the world with saintly smiles that few would think to question.
Yet one need only look passed the mirage of flesh to see a naked soul trembling in a darkness they themselves created, the soul that they deny and never speak of but whom their broken hearts mourn.
Their soul reeks of decay, a stench that rises and stings the nostrils as sweet perfume, with cries of anguish that echo through the halls as laughter. No one knows what rots on the inside, what becomes more and more a hollowed shell. But this is the price that many men pay to be adored by their kin, to have the light of suns themselves kiss their feet. Let them kill the spirit that the gods afford them, for what greater men exist in this world than those dying to live?