12-08-2013, 12:13 PM
I think what happened might've been the reverse: my earliest draft had the ending (the Honda stanza, and empathy line) nearly as is. At which point I decided to focus on the imagery and wording of the preceding three (I felt I had bigger fish to fry, and the ending was "fair enough, it's plot, isn't it?"). You're right, it needs to be fleshed out. These days I feel like a very slow writer; I don't know how much time I'll have...
Also a small technical note: black mambas aren't normally found in West Africa. Similarly, a part of me feels ashamed at including zouglou for the simple reason that I liked Ivory Coast for the line above, though I did my youtube/wikipedia research. Anyway...
Also a small technical note: black mambas aren't normally found in West Africa. Similarly, a part of me feels ashamed at including zouglou for the simple reason that I liked Ivory Coast for the line above, though I did my youtube/wikipedia research. Anyway...