11-26-2013, 05:58 AM
Hi Todd,
I read chs 1-9 a few hours ago (hate reading serially, so I let them bunch up a bit), and here are my thoughts:
--As someone else said, very readable. But as you said somewhere, this is all pretty rough. But as I read it's like I can feel what the polished version will be like, I can see the story through the words. Which is of course what every novelist wants. =]
--Since reading it I've thought about the story/characters more than once. That's good.
--Someone mentioned how you used the characters names too frequently early on. I hadn't really noticed but once it was pointed out it became more annoying. You used "the other girl" a few times but I really didn't like that compromise at all.
--The story is weird and dark, which is fine of course, but sometimes I had a hard time suspending my disbelief, which was not so good.
Anyway overall, nice work and thanks for sharing!
-justcloudy
I read chs 1-9 a few hours ago (hate reading serially, so I let them bunch up a bit), and here are my thoughts:
--As someone else said, very readable. But as you said somewhere, this is all pretty rough. But as I read it's like I can feel what the polished version will be like, I can see the story through the words. Which is of course what every novelist wants. =]
--Since reading it I've thought about the story/characters more than once. That's good.
--Someone mentioned how you used the characters names too frequently early on. I hadn't really noticed but once it was pointed out it became more annoying. You used "the other girl" a few times but I really didn't like that compromise at all.
--The story is weird and dark, which is fine of course, but sometimes I had a hard time suspending my disbelief, which was not so good.
Anyway overall, nice work and thanks for sharing!
-justcloudy
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The howling beast is back.
The howling beast is back.