11-25-2013, 01:22 AM
Thank you for your truly excellent feedback, cidermaid; you put my own paltry critiques to shame
I think what I need to do is step back once in a while and consider how a new reader would regard what I've written. In other words, I need to crawl out of my own arse
The three souls is a reference to something I read in Aldous Huxley's The Devils of Loudun: once upon a time, people attributed the body's functions to the workings of three souls: a vegetative, sensitive and rational soul. This idea were discussed in scholar Robert Burton's book The Anatomy of Melancholy, and in this poem I think I've wrongly attributed that idea to him, when really of course it goes all the way back to Aristotle.
I'll definitely consider using some of your suggestions, especially those regarding repetition (one of my other vices), in any future edit. Thank you again
I think what I need to do is step back once in a while and consider how a new reader would regard what I've written. In other words, I need to crawl out of my own arse The three souls is a reference to something I read in Aldous Huxley's The Devils of Loudun: once upon a time, people attributed the body's functions to the workings of three souls: a vegetative, sensitive and rational soul. This idea were discussed in scholar Robert Burton's book The Anatomy of Melancholy, and in this poem I think I've wrongly attributed that idea to him, when really of course it goes all the way back to Aristotle.I'll definitely consider using some of your suggestions, especially those regarding repetition (one of my other vices), in any future edit. Thank you again
"We believe that we invent symbols. The truth is that they invent us; we are their creatures, shaped by their hard, defining edges." - Gene Wolfe