Primal (new poem, Edit 3)

[heslopian]

The room would shake violently
every ten minutes or so.
It was small, useless,
most treasured: my brother Is the room part of an abandoned railway station?
and I would spend hours there,
roaring and howling at the trains
crashing by.

A funeral today, another
support of the bridge has gone down. Is the funeral a metaphor relating to the bridge's gradual disassembly, or has the narrator returned to town for a literal funeral?
And like a ghost, I appeared
in front of our old house. Excellent couple of lines, coming as they do after a verse of joyous childhood memory.
It was quiet: Is this line needed?
they've buried the tracks,
placed a little park on top.

I closed my eyes,
fast train approaching. Is this a literal or remembered train?

Inhaled all the air in the park,
the streets, the city;
inhaled all the light from the houses,
the cars, the sun itself -

and let it all out. Wonderfully subtle last verse and line.

I found it really hard to critique this one because it's pretty much perfect as is. Compact, well-conveyed and rich in atmosphere. That's why most of my actual critique is just requests for clarification, and even my one suggestion for removal isn't one I feel very strongly about. Thank you for the read