Wet Knife (Revision)

Wet Knife (Revision)

Nick

member

Posts: 51
Threads: 10
Joined: Sep 2013

11-13-2013, 05:00 AM

(11-12-2013, 06:23 AM)Todd Wrote: Revision

You mistake it for a flower.
A thorn near the heart.
A lover's bouquet streaming
limpid petals upon your fingers tips.

This is an interesting piece of work. I revised your revision to show my thoughts.
Yes, quite a tight little bundle of sparkle.
Thanks for posting it.

~~~

Original

You mistake it for a flower,
with a thorn near the heart,
a lover's bouquet streaming
through your fingertips
in silent petals.

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Messages In This Thread

Wet Knife (Revision) - by Todd - 11-12-2013, 06:23 AM

RE: Wet Knife - by heslopian - 11-12-2013, 01:51 PM

RE: Wet Knife - by Todd - 11-12-2013, 07:57 PM

RE: Wet Knife - by Euan - 11-12-2013, 07:59 PM

RE: Wet Knife (Revision) - by Todd - 11-12-2013, 08:08 PM

RE: Wet Knife (Revision) - by Euan - 11-12-2013, 08:22 PM

RE: Wet Knife (Revision) - by Todd - 11-12-2013, 08:26 PM

RE: Wet Knife (Revision) - by Nick - 11-13-2013, 05:00 AM

RE: Wet Knife (Revision) - by ChristopherSea - 11-13-2013, 05:40 AM

RE: Wet Knife (Revision) - by Todd - 11-13-2013, 08:13 AM

RE: Wet Knife (Revision) - by Stephanie - 11-13-2013, 11:02 PM

RE: Wet Knife (Revision) - by Todd - 11-14-2013, 07:45 AM

RE: Wet Knife (Revision) - by Stephanie - 11-14-2013, 05:26 PM

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