Myosotis

[milo]

I am curious what criteria you are using for line breaks here.

Hey Milo,
I am not an educated poet. I don't know why i broke the lines the way i did. But, i do read quite a bit and i'm sure most of the poetry that i write is in a form that i've seen somewhere before. I don't know, it feels right to me this way, because when i read it aloud it slows down the pace of the poem. Call it artistic license.
Cheers,
Chazz

the line break is one of the most important aspects in free verse poetry. i have seen people agonize for days over a single break. These seemed to occur by you dropping a pile of words on the floor and where they landed they landed.

For example:

One word lines should be /very/ rare in poetry. Only used when a word is so important to your central metaphor and so musical it must stand alone. You did that six times. your first line is "Child"

How am I, as a reader with no knowledge of the poem at all yet revealed, supposed to stop and consider this word?

It is like you are telling me (the reader) to just go shit in my hat for a bit.

Here is a discussion on it that may help you some:

http://www.pigpenpoetry.com/showthread.php?tid=4281