Alone, yet Surrounded

[Viktor Vaughn]

I speak to my self Why?
knowing that the zombies Are we talking 21st century sci-fi zombies? Philosophical zombies? There isn't much detail on the setting, so it's hard to relate to the rest of the poem
are just like everybody else How were they supposed to be different?

I sit quietly observing Why?
the people surrounding me Are we talking about people, or zombies here?
not knowing Not knowing what?

sickened by evil
who am i to turn to Punctuation would be good here, to separate this line from the next.
i hate the deceitful

realizing that i am my own pupil I don't understand how this line, or the rest of the poem really, connects with the first part of the poem
I found my savior
and in returned showed me to his people The grammar here is making it hard to understand the idea

for I was never truly alone
I had God
Goodbye evil Would work better as a separate line from this stanza, otherwise the ideas don't flow together

Overall, not too bad. The idea that a dependance on God saves us from evil is clear. Work a bit on trying to create a scene for people to imagine. People by nature work better visually, meaning, if our minds are seeing the same things the words are telling us, the poem is effective. I found whilst reading this my mind was wandering to other topics. Work a bit on finding ways to captivate the reader.