10-18-2013, 05:36 PM
Structural errors make it hard to read, including grammar (it's not its, "grabbing we" [intentional poor grammar for the sake of a rhyme?]), and although it can be clever to use the same rhyme throughout the whole poem, if you don't get creative it can get pretty repetitive. You could get creative by the location of rhymes, using half-rhymes to transition onto a new rhyme (now I'm saying 'rhyme' a lot).
It would definitely be easier to read and understand though it it wasn't so rushed, as Malu said. It's not a bad idea, it's just hard to understand the idea because my brain is trying so hard to understand the structure.
It would definitely be easier to read and understand though it it wasn't so rushed, as Malu said. It's not a bad idea, it's just hard to understand the idea because my brain is trying so hard to understand the structure.