09-26-2013, 11:39 AM
Thnx for reading/feedbacking 
I think this is the first poem that i've written that i'm proud of (though i'll probably hate it in a week >.<) at least it was the first poem I wrote that I felt I needed to write.
I have a few revisions in mind, mostly small changes. I may edit then post it in mild critique idk idk maybe getting ahead of myself, but feel like it might be rewarding. Still struggeling with "atoms", I did fear it was too sciency but I cant find another way to express the idea that isn't vague or overwordy. Will have to think about it for sure, though im probably overthinking it as is. Thnx again.
I think this is the first poem that i've written that i'm proud of (though i'll probably hate it in a week >.<) at least it was the first poem I wrote that I felt I needed to write.
I have a few revisions in mind, mostly small changes. I may edit then post it in mild critique idk idk maybe getting ahead of myself, but feel like it might be rewarding. Still struggeling with "atoms", I did fear it was too sciency but I cant find another way to express the idea that isn't vague or overwordy. Will have to think about it for sure, though im probably overthinking it as is. Thnx again.