09-18-2013, 01:10 AM
(Edit 11/2)
Hunger gnaws at the bones
Like a bratty child clings to its mother
Moldy hair with the stink of sweat
Their dusty skin soldered with dirt
The groans of smoke in the air
Echo along the bricked walls
Obscuring every exit,
Smelling of sweet tangerine,
Seducing lost wanderers
This is no asylum.
Twitters of spider legs
The scratching of the joking mistress (Grating)
Laughing
Her friend who bangs the columns
In to the “music of voice” that only he can hear.
The only peace lies in the trappings of water along the bare
Edges where only light can follow
Her only desire of the dark lies in receding regret for the sun.
She aches. Missing her moment.
The starved hunger for nothing
For what could satisfy?
**********
Eeek! I feel like I either improved it alot or destroyed it -__-. I kind of wanted to change out scratching to grating buuuutt I already added, deleted, replaced like half of it, and yeah. And then, that "Laughing" line. I have no idea what to do with it but I don't want to get rid of it either. Thoughts to think.
(Original Posting)
Hunger gnaws at the bones
Like a bratty child clinging to its mother
Moldy hair with the stank of sweat
And dusty skin with the imprints of dirt
Unable to ever be clean.
The groans of smoke in the air
Echo along the bricked walls
Hiding every exit and opening every entrance
This is no asylum.
The twitters of spider legs
The scratching of the joking mistress
Laughing without rhyme and reason
Her friend who bangs the columns
In to the music of voice that only he can hear.
The only peace lies in the trappings of water along the bare
Edges of which only light can follow
The only desire of the dark lies in receding regret for the sun.
It echoes light and then disappears.
The starved hunger for nothing
For what could satisfy?
*******
It's a part of collection I'm writing. It has to do with unattractive imagery maybe a touch of insanity.
I know there are many issues with my writing but I wanted to kind of learn more about how the forum works through this. So,
FIRST POST, completed
Hunger gnaws at the bones
Like a bratty child clings to its mother
Moldy hair with the stink of sweat
Their dusty skin soldered with dirt
The groans of smoke in the air
Echo along the bricked walls
Obscuring every exit,
Smelling of sweet tangerine,
Seducing lost wanderers
This is no asylum.
Twitters of spider legs
The scratching of the joking mistress (Grating)
Laughing
Her friend who bangs the columns
In to the “music of voice” that only he can hear.
The only peace lies in the trappings of water along the bare
Edges where only light can follow
Her only desire of the dark lies in receding regret for the sun.
She aches. Missing her moment.
The starved hunger for nothing
For what could satisfy?
**********
Eeek! I feel like I either improved it alot or destroyed it -__-. I kind of wanted to change out scratching to grating buuuutt I already added, deleted, replaced like half of it, and yeah. And then, that "Laughing" line. I have no idea what to do with it but I don't want to get rid of it either. Thoughts to think.
(Original Posting)
Hunger gnaws at the bones
Like a bratty child clinging to its mother
Moldy hair with the stank of sweat
And dusty skin with the imprints of dirt
Unable to ever be clean.
The groans of smoke in the air
Echo along the bricked walls
Hiding every exit and opening every entrance
This is no asylum.
The twitters of spider legs
The scratching of the joking mistress
Laughing without rhyme and reason
Her friend who bangs the columns
In to the music of voice that only he can hear.
The only peace lies in the trappings of water along the bare
Edges of which only light can follow
The only desire of the dark lies in receding regret for the sun.
It echoes light and then disappears.
The starved hunger for nothing
For what could satisfy?
*******
It's a part of collection I'm writing. It has to do with unattractive imagery maybe a touch of insanity.
I know there are many issues with my writing but I wanted to kind of learn more about how the forum works through this. So,
FIRST POST, completed