The Big November
#19
I love this as a minimalist piece, and I'm assuming at one point you had commas. If you drop those, you have to use line breaks to direct the reader. I had to read twice because I thought for sure the birds were stopping the sky. I would suggest another drop down after stop to clarify, but that's really nit picking as this is a fantastic piece.
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Messages In This Thread
The Big November - by only rob - 10-12-2011, 01:46 AM
RE: The Big November - by Aish - 10-12-2011, 04:16 AM
RE: The Big November - by Leanne - 10-12-2011, 04:22 AM
RE: The Big November - by only rob - 10-12-2011, 10:35 PM
RE: The Big November - by Ca ne fait rien - 10-12-2011, 04:26 AM
RE: The Big November - by Aish - 10-12-2011, 06:00 AM
RE: The Big November - by Leanne - 10-13-2011, 04:46 AM
RE: The Big November - by addy - 10-13-2011, 03:55 PM
RE: The Big November - by only rob - 10-13-2011, 10:47 PM
RE: The Big November - by Wildcard - 10-14-2011, 03:17 AM
RE: The Big November - by Todd - 10-14-2011, 07:21 AM
RE: The Big November - by only rob - 10-15-2011, 11:28 PM
RE: The Big November - by billy - 10-16-2011, 02:23 PM
RE: The Big November - by Bronte - 03-17-2012, 09:21 PM
RE: The Big November - by ChristopherSea - 09-17-2013, 02:44 AM
RE: The Big November - by milo - 09-17-2013, 02:48 AM
RE: The Big November - by ChristopherSea - 09-17-2013, 03:13 AM
RE: The Big November - by tectak - 09-17-2013, 04:43 AM
RE: The Big November - by bena - 09-17-2013, 10:16 AM



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