Two Eggs

Two Eggs

Malu

Hothead

Posts: 104
Threads: 14
Joined: Sep 2013

09-14-2013, 03:29 AM

(09-14-2013, 01:21 AM)shenaz Wrote: Two eggs in the pot
Two nice round eggs
The water is hot and the heat is on
We splutter and curdle
Two round eggs
In the heat of the moment

The simplicity of the poem works well, and can be effective. I definitely got the visual image you wanted to convey, but not really sure what your take home message is. That could just be my novice poetry knowledge though. If you wanted to strengthen this, I would space out the imagery and incorporate some detail and allusions as to what you're really saying.

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Messages In This Thread

Two Eggs - by shenaz - 09-14-2013, 01:21 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by Malu - 09-14-2013, 03:29 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by shenaz - 09-14-2013, 03:31 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by Malu - 09-14-2013, 04:01 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by shenaz - 09-14-2013, 04:05 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by Snowbells - 09-14-2013, 09:17 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by shenaz - 09-14-2013, 05:23 PM

RE: Two Eggs - by nhanna1223 - 02-03-2014, 02:11 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by shenaz - 02-03-2014, 06:05 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by LickinLyrics - 02-03-2014, 07:16 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by tomoffing - 02-03-2014, 07:56 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by DominoMan - 02-03-2014, 02:41 PM

RE: Two Eggs - by kingmicahde - 02-07-2014, 07:26 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by shenaz - 02-08-2014, 02:12 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by kingmicahde - 02-08-2014, 04:31 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by shenaz - 02-08-2014, 03:58 PM

RE: Two Eggs - by Sheep - 02-11-2014, 06:29 PM

RE: Two Eggs - by shenaz - 02-12-2014, 03:17 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by cfgorman - 03-01-2014, 01:27 PM

RE: Two Eggs - by shenaz - 03-02-2014, 05:46 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by Izo - 03-15-2014, 07:56 PM

RE: Two Eggs - by WordJunky - 03-16-2014, 08:29 PM

RE: Two Eggs - by Babeanew - 04-04-2014, 09:17 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by Mopkins - 04-06-2014, 02:10 PM

RE: Two Eggs - by California - 04-07-2014, 07:40 PM

RE: Two Eggs - by kindofahippy - 04-08-2014, 12:23 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by Robert9614 - 04-22-2014, 08:35 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by Willpark - 04-29-2014, 12:54 PM

RE: Two Eggs - by RiverNotch - 04-29-2014, 06:17 PM

RE: Two Eggs - by constellation - 04-30-2014, 07:36 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by shenaz - 05-01-2014, 09:27 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by bbcashdollar - 05-12-2014, 06:03 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by SuicidalBlueJay - 05-12-2014, 11:22 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by newsclippings - 05-12-2014, 11:38 AM

RE: Two Eggs - by Igor - 02-28-2016, 11:06 AM

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