09-10-2013, 07:41 AM
(09-08-2013, 01:07 PM)PoetryAndPhysics Wrote: Love all things andThis is rather all a bit simplistic and would never work. Nice sentiments abound though.
love yourself, so all the
kindness will spread
around the world.
Every person you meet
should get a hug.
Then you can lean in close
and whisper in their ear,
“I'm here for you forever,
you can count me as a friend,
and when peace on earth reigns,
we'll clasp each other's hands,
tilt our heads to heaven,
then crumble down dead.”
I think you should explore this theme with a bit more range, add a few metaphors, dance with some similies, act up a bit.
crumble down dead I'm not sure of, if you had gone to all the effort of clasping hands and tilting heads, just to end up like that,,, well, what a waste really.

