Morning Despair
#4
He laces his boots tightly
strangling his ankles in silent metaphor"
In silent metaphor? I think this part should have been left out. Its like over-instructing the reader on what to feel. You need to leave more to the imagination. All the same the poem is very articulate.
Bi aori adan fi sebo, ao lo obe
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Messages In This Thread
Morning Despair - by Reilley - 09-05-2013, 08:37 AM
RE: Morning Despair - by Spikerider - 09-05-2013, 10:52 AM
RE: Morning Despair - by Elsie Fillmore - 09-06-2013, 09:50 AM
RE: Morning Despair - by shenaz - 09-06-2013, 06:56 PM
RE: Morning Despair - by Reilley - 09-06-2013, 09:19 PM
RE: Morning Despair - by shenaz - 09-06-2013, 09:36 PM
RE: Morning Despair - by ScurryFunger - 09-09-2013, 07:52 AM



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