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Latency (edit 1)
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09-02-2013, 12:17 PM
This has nice music but I can't help but feel that the alliteration is a little overbearing. I read it as "Thunder deCLARES the CALM as a CROWN..." The alliteration with "wears" "world" and "welled" is a little bit better but it's still much. The rest of the alliteration is a little bit more subtle but it gets annoying again in the third sentence.
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| Messages In This Thread |
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Latency (edit 1) - by btrudo - 09-02-2013, 02:31 AM
RE: Latency - by whatispoetry? - 09-02-2013, 12:17 PM
RE: Latency (edit 1) - by btrudo - 09-03-2013, 02:35 AM
RE: Latency - by expiring_touch - 09-02-2013, 01:46 PM
RE: Latency - by allykat727 - 09-03-2013, 12:21 AM
RE: Latency (edit 1) - by in-need-of-an-empire - 09-05-2013, 07:18 AM
RE: Latency (edit 1) - by btrudo - 09-06-2013, 08:33 AM
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