08-31-2013, 03:03 AM
Hi makeshift,
You have some interesting images here. I especially like the one in the ending. I wonder if you meant to say "dandelion"?
I wasn't too crazy about the repetition in L2 S1, I don't think you need the extra "spat". It does work, but to me it reads smoother without, and it doesn't lose the meaning. JMHO of course.
Best,
LB
You have some interesting images here. I especially like the one in the ending. I wonder if you meant to say "dandelion"?
I wasn't too crazy about the repetition in L2 S1, I don't think you need the extra "spat". It does work, but to me it reads smoother without, and it doesn't lose the meaning. JMHO of course.
Best,
LB