08-29-2013, 07:42 AM
Hi Xenophon,
I agree with jdguyb that a lot of the rhymes seem forced, though there are more then a few that I think are pretty nice. The poem as a whole felt whimsical, it was a fun read. I think you could focus on being a bit more economical, it reads fairly wordy at times. Thnx for sharing. (:
I agree with jdguyb that a lot of the rhymes seem forced, though there are more then a few that I think are pretty nice. The poem as a whole felt whimsical, it was a fun read. I think you could focus on being a bit more economical, it reads fairly wordy at times. Thnx for sharing. (: