After the Flood

[heslopian]

Edit 2.00 milo.christophersea,btrudo for the comma removal after that.

He kicks beneath the paling crust
to where the sun has failed the earth
and flocculation turned the juice
into a suffocant for seed
that quenched the animating fuse.
The flood has gone; to heal the land
he scarifies the earth again
and turns the rotting germ to light.
Time walks beside the new-sown grain
and promises each dormant husk
another chance...
provided there is rain.


original
He kicks beneath the paling crust
to where the sun has failed the earth
and flocculation turned the juice
into a suffocant for seed,
and quenched the fuse of life.
The flood has gone; upon bare land
he scarifies the earth again
and turns the rotting germ to light.
Time walks beside the new sown grain
and promises each dormant husk
another chance.
Provided there is rain.

Tectak
Spring 2013

nice use of big words

Please refrain from such brief and throwaway remarks in Serious Workshopping. The forum requires some kind of in-depth feedback, even if it's just describing what specifically you liked.