08-03-2013, 02:45 AM
Enjoyed. Haven't read all the comments but I noticed the change from semicolon to comma after "ash" and it seems an odd move.
I have trouble seeing bluebells blush.
I'd suggest a semicolon after "shade".
I wonder why you'd be introducing "sails" into this setting. Apart from that, I like the last 6 lines.
I have trouble seeing bluebells blush.
I'd suggest a semicolon after "shade".
I wonder why you'd be introducing "sails" into this setting. Apart from that, I like the last 6 lines.
Before criticising a person try walking a mile in their shoes. Then when you do criticise that person, you are a mile away.... and you have their shoes.