08-01-2013, 03:29 PM
(07-28-2013, 06:00 PM)soonforgotten? Wrote: So it's about getting under someone's skin? It seems to me as if there are several ideas pulling in different directions here. Not sure if they should all squash in the same poem.... however, I like the separate elements.It isn't intended to be about getting under someones skin. The reader completes the artistic process, so I would love to know how and where this piece diverges for you since you said it comes across as several ideas pulling in different directions. For me there is only one idea/theme, but I value my readers and their input. Please let me know where this fails.
(07-28-2013, 10:19 AM)Aish Wrote: summer romance drips
the taste of moon in my mouth
under your sky-map
PS. If you can, try your hand at giving some of the others a bit of feedback. If you already have, thanks, can you do some more?