Africa

[heslopian]

As my eyes wander dreamingly astray
from one star to the next in rapid pace "In rapid pace" sounds odd. "With a rapid pace" feels more appropriate, though that could just be me.
Getting lost and ending up far, far away
on the night sky of an unknown place Should "on" be "in"? And what unknown place are you alluding to? Does the night sky make the narrator feel as though they're in an alien environment?

I see under a moon so round and bold I like the description of the moon as "round and bold"; it's evocatively concise.
shadows working though the sun has set Most people, I'd wager, know that the moon can create shadows on Earth, so "though the sun has set" seems unnecessary.
Still their hands are empty and cold; Whose hands?
their foreheads dusty, bathing in sweat

I think about those who don’t own a pen
– what do they do when they want to write?
those who lie sleepless in their humble den
kept awake by thoughts but without a light This is a good verse; it's melancholy and sweet; but it starts a new train of thought, continued in the next verse, which comes out of nowhere.

And I wonder how they all ended up here;
all the papers, pencils, erasers, and books
Some of them must have come from there
carved out of an old Adansonia's[/i] crooks I really don't understand this verse. How did we go from contemplating the night sky and landscape to wondering where stationary comes from? And what's with the last two lines? Are you suggesting that "papers, pencils, erasers, and books" have some kind of spiritual link to our human ancestors?

The poem starts reasonably well, but by its end becomes incomprehensible. A lot more clarity of thought is needed here. Whose hands and foreheads are you talking about in verse three, for instance? There's a good poem buried in this, I feel. A poem about someone contemplating Africa at night, then wondering about the origins of human expression and how people cope when filled with magnificent thoughts which they can't express for whatever reason.
All my critique is JMHO, of course. Thank you for the read