Rough Morning?

[tectak]

EDIT 1
Rough morning?
Meh, I wish I could have warned her back then.
This is not a walk,
in the dark.
It's a rodeo, with no clown.

So why sometimes do you fight frowns?
When my favorite color is brown.
You, always standing atop, of mounds.
Lone mounds,
crashing down ontop of me.

I feel blessed with every hit.
Hurt with every miss,
like a dog without a bone,
in a graveyard full of stones.
With the moans of the deceased,
warning me at every meet.

Who knows where it goes from here.
Step by step,
pill by pill,
fear, and fear.
I have lost and will always lose you.

My Angel, the only girl I have loved.
Ha, you know who you are.
Looking down at me from a red brick tower afar.
Pray for me so i don’t make my same mistake.
Pray for me so my heart stops to quake.

Rough morning? Hm, My angel I pray.
Make me say, that I will love you this way.
When I look at you higher place, bring me back to grace.
When I win a race, bring my back to last place.

Babe. Remember? Your running

Hi bunx,
I am the worst of the anti-cliche lynch-mob and would hang'em all high given the chance BUT I am entirely (unusual) with Leanne on this one. My biggest chew with those who slip in cliches is their naive belief that no one has read anything before and that they will not be aware of the the inadequacy in the poet. So it is a matter of purpose rather than paucity that permits the use of cliches as you have done.
On to other matters.Punctuation. If you ARE going to use it, use it correctly. If not, expect some criticism from purists but ignore if you so wish; it is your evolution that is at stake, not theirs.
No comma S1, end L2.
I won't go on and on, as this is not the right forum (sadly, but your choice. Do you want me to move it to serious for a real bashing?Just say.) but glaring at me is:
"So why sometimes do you fight frowns?
When my favorite color is brown."
This should be, and I guess you can see this is logic:
"So why sometimes do you fight frowns
when my favorite color is brown?"
See. It is that easy to make an old man very happy ( I say this for milo. I can see him smiling now)
Read through it ALL. SPEAK it out loud. Pause when you think it is natural to so do and then punctuate to stamp your authority on the piece.
This is me liking it.
Best,
tectak