Street Sleep Walking Edit 1 milo, billy, brownlie,leanne et al.

[milo]

Absolutely.
Returned from holiday suitably refreshed?
Yes...I genuinely posted this uncorrected/unfiltered from a pretty turgid event some years back. I did do a rewrite but without enthusiasm. I intendfollowing my own advice and really hacking it up. To that end, let loose a fusillade! What is left after the slaughter may be thebasis for a new piece. If nothing is left,so be it.
Be warned, I have dozens if efforts like this just lying around.
All comments will be welcomed. I like to workshop one every now and again and if its my own I can't offend anyone!
Best
tectak

Yah, holiday was good. I would love to see you really workshop this into something pretty. I would be happy to do the almighty snip if you are too scared . . .

Vasectomise away....if you have the balls!
Best,
tectak

colonic wynds (and) city-black alleys ,
ensconce the fallen.
They are sack-wrapped societal garbage, asleep in
blank syringed days. Wet blood-threatened bodies,
they are chilled into comas .

Look into shadows, where darkness (shrouds?)
gratitude; vistas,
threaten by closeness to you , distance becomes
the shield, . Do not linger on the lost
but sleep (walk), and sleep like the blind.

Listen, Hear (the) lungs', crackling congestion, broken by (the) silence
of Death . They live on their highway - glass-broken, tin-rattled,
cat-littered, flesh-rotted, waste-strewn and piss-sodden.
Enuresis dreams in each tossing bundle; deaf or dead, the unheeded prod.
So sleep-walk my beauties, 'til the wakening call.

I would start somewhere around here.