still I can fly (thank you Brownlie, Volaticus, and Billy)

[Heartafire]

I'm going to edit your poem a bit I hope you don't mind. Also, birds (especially wounded birds) are prominent symbols in Chopin's The Awakening.

I’m an odd bird,
with one wing
To guide me.


Rustling leaves on my branch
shake my foothold.
I am sightless Sightless and shadow convey the same sentiment
I would sweep swaths of light across the - I would sweep swaths of light is pretty good I love yearning
dark .

I’ll fly away
chiming like a bell -- I like this line but I don't know if it is too clichéd or not
when the dawn ignites the sky.

I think the part at the end about having a voice can be expressed better by showing an action.

I rather like my edited version, but that may be because I had a hand in creating it. I thought you had some good lines but superfluous language could be trimmed.

Hi there, Brownlie. Thank you so much for reading and commenting.
I appreciate your suggestions very much. I must disagree regarding sightless and shadow but get your thought there. I am reviewing the
ending, perhaps I can find a better way to close this out.
best,
Heart

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Hi Heart,
I really enjoy your poem.
My favorite part is the first stanza. I like to read it out loud; there's a kind of 'askew' rhythm to it, which I love, and it fits well in the context.
I noticed that you capitalized "To guide me", and I wondered if that was intentional or just a typo, since the rest of your poem is only in capital letters after full stops?
Lovely poem, thanks for putting it up.
Best,
-LB

Hi Volaticus, I am so glad that you enjoyed this. The cap on "To guide me" is a typo, sorry about that. Thanks for bringing that to my attention.
I have been having problems logging in lately, did not mean to be this long in replying to the comments on this, just couldn't get in but
I persevered :-)(.
My best,
Heart