To The Masses (edit based on Tom's corrections and some of his suggestions )
#14
take 3:

I pray sweet hope,
because it is eternal,
instead of love
that might betray.

Don't tear down the walls
that hold you too.
But if you must,
please, do not waste
what is not yet your own.

Between despair and delight
we tumble around.
The days steal
our lives from us.

Our lovers come and go
leaving us lonely in the end.
Politics is not soothing us either;

but I still talk America.
I talk to a beautiful nation.

You are not beautiful to yourself,
but by the basic idea
that gave birth to you.

Just dare to read Jefferson
to see your natural rights and,
what you may have become

made a few changes. just a few. loved the poem


my edits suck. i think if you add natural or rights in the poem the theme could be more apparent
Only one thing is impossible for God: To find any sense in any copyright law on the planet.
--mark twain
Bunx
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Messages In This Thread
RE: To The Masses - by tectak - 06-08-2013, 03:15 AM
RE: To The Masses - by serge gurkski - 06-08-2013, 06:44 AM
RE: To The Masses (cleaned up) - by serge gurkski - 06-11-2013, 05:44 PM
RE: To The Masses (cleaned up) - by tectak - 06-11-2013, 07:02 PM
RE: To The Masses (cleaned up) - by serge gurkski - 06-11-2013, 08:48 PM
RE: To The Masses (edit based on Tom's corrections and some of his suggestions ) - by Bunx - 06-12-2013, 01:47 AM



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