The Chase

[Leanne]

Really interesting stream-of-consciousness writing with just enough detail to be interesting while remaining mysterious (especially the "knowing what I know" at the end).

"The drip of sweat slowly cascades down my brow
some of it beading like water on a freshly waxed Camaro"

I can't reconcile the idea of a drip slowly cascading -- my suggestion for those lines would be:

Drips of sweat bead on my brow
like water on a freshly waxed Camaro

(the Camaro is a damn cool image, by the way)

That's all I've got