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in the air
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06-06-2013, 02:32 PM
I think that honestly a lot of the poem is cliche. I also dont know about comparing this object of desire to something that should be in a child's dream, although I do like the stand alone visual.
Also the line I want to be you is a little raw. It comes across strange. Work on line breaks. Thank you for the read. |
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in the air - by anna randy - 06-06-2013, 11:28 AM
RE: in the air - by ccfly - 06-06-2013, 11:34 AM
RE: in the air - by anna randy - 06-06-2013, 11:57 AM
RE: in the air - by Brownlie - 06-06-2013, 12:21 PM
RE: in the air - by philoinlove - 06-06-2013, 02:32 PM
RE: in the air - by newsclippings - 06-06-2013, 04:19 PM
RE: in the air - by canofworms - 06-06-2013, 10:38 PM
RE: in the air - by Leanne - 06-07-2013, 04:56 AM
RE: in the air - by R.C. KITCHENS - 06-09-2013, 02:08 PM
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