05-30-2013, 01:47 AM
Revision 2
.....................
Behind the anonymity of the Avatar
bad boys bicker and banter
their lofty judgements.
They strap on silver spurs.
They never sleep,
crowing and clawing,
in cockfights of ego.
Masks are knocked askew.
Hints are dropped.
Who is Who,
and Who said
What?
Where is the Sage
who speaks few words,
yet shares his
Infinite Wisdom?
Billy, Thanks for your technical help. I'm still learning the ropes here
Thank you also for your critique, I tried out some of your suggestions.
The piece is sexist. I wrote it after lurking on a discussion board. The men seemed to love tearing into each other I can't seem to get it up for a new ending. I will ponder that
.....................
Behind the anonymity of the Avatar
bad boys bicker and banter
their lofty judgements.
They strap on silver spurs.
They never sleep,
crowing and clawing,
in cockfights of ego.
Masks are knocked askew.
Hints are dropped.
Who is Who,
and Who said
What?
Where is the Sage
who speaks few words,
yet shares his
Infinite Wisdom?
Billy, Thanks for your technical help. I'm still learning the ropes here
Thank you also for your critique, I tried out some of your suggestions.The piece is sexist. I wrote it after lurking on a discussion board. The men seemed to love tearing into each other
I can't seem to get it up for a new ending. I will ponder that