05-20-2013, 08:47 PM
Ode to a dead poem:
I start to seriously dislike the hare. Maybe its very well deserved death was really just meant to lead me into temptation? A kind of agent provocateur. No, the dog's to blame. I mean the "hunter's" bitch. And now I have forgiven her already! (Because of the good licking she gave me. See original))
With no one else left, it must be me, then.
I must agree with billy (the fattening, the non-ode-ishness). I even know why it would be in vain to try to fatten it up. The first few lines are too cohesive /clotted. I can neither pull them apart by stuffing them nor push them together into fewer longer lines.
The poet, killing his poem by over-editing, has by way of side effect triggered subconsciously the pampering by his critics (well: 50% of his commenters).
But wait! The poem's not dead yet: Salvation is near and easy to get. All that had to be done, would be to turn the text upside down.
The poet would simply start with the combined frog-sauerkraut stanza to set the scene and then finish the ode off with a nice little (and slightly cynical) lament (making (dead) ends meet with tec's quote of Ecclesiastes).
It's easy! (Id est, patet exposita ad oculos. At least I can see it now. ,-) )
But maybe too easy for me. Let me explain, why: I think I could come to the ode's rescue by investing even more righthandedness. I have an emotional problem with this one now. I am too distanced by now from the strong feelings that gave birth to it. Still I might get back to it at a later point in time, maybe occasioned by a similar event.
Thank you again for the input. I learned quite a lot from it.
cheers
serge
I start to seriously dislike the hare. Maybe its very well deserved death was really just meant to lead me into temptation? A kind of agent provocateur. No, the dog's to blame. I mean the "hunter's" bitch. And now I have forgiven her already! (Because of the good licking she gave me. See original))
With no one else left, it must be me, then.
I must agree with billy (the fattening, the non-ode-ishness). I even know why it would be in vain to try to fatten it up. The first few lines are too cohesive /clotted. I can neither pull them apart by stuffing them nor push them together into fewer longer lines.
The poet, killing his poem by over-editing, has by way of side effect triggered subconsciously the pampering by his critics (well: 50% of his commenters).
But wait! The poem's not dead yet: Salvation is near and easy to get. All that had to be done, would be to turn the text upside down.
The poet would simply start with the combined frog-sauerkraut stanza to set the scene and then finish the ode off with a nice little (and slightly cynical) lament (making (dead) ends meet with tec's quote of Ecclesiastes).
It's easy! (Id est, patet exposita ad oculos. At least I can see it now. ,-) )
But maybe too easy for me. Let me explain, why: I think I could come to the ode's rescue by investing even more righthandedness. I have an emotional problem with this one now. I am too distanced by now from the strong feelings that gave birth to it. Still I might get back to it at a later point in time, maybe occasioned by a similar event.
Thank you again for the input. I learned quite a lot from it.
cheers
serge