05-03-2013, 12:30 PM
hi knico
the poem is too cliche, and the words don't bring the reader in to the poem.
the tile (a river of lies) is pretty big cliche before the poem starts.
always make it original as possible,
you could cut at least two thirds of the poem without losing anything.
the three stanza or so you'd have left would be ready to edit.
the poem is too cliche, and the words don't bring the reader in to the poem.
the tile (a river of lies) is pretty big cliche before the poem starts.
always make it original as possible,
you could cut at least two thirds of the poem without losing anything.
the three stanza or so you'd have left would be ready to edit.