05-03-2013, 09:10 AM
Thank you for your kind, honest and thoughtful feedback, Bilbo
This began as a free verse poem, and then I tried to see if I could make it blank verse by giving each line roughly ten syllables alternating between weak and stressed. As Milo suggested, I thought about making it a sonnet for a while, but that didn't work out. Thanks again for your input. I'll definitely change "how" to "when" in L4, as "how" clearly doesn't make sense
Cheers for pointing that out, Bilbo, serge and Milo. xxx
This began as a free verse poem, and then I tried to see if I could make it blank verse by giving each line roughly ten syllables alternating between weak and stressed. As Milo suggested, I thought about making it a sonnet for a while, but that didn't work out. Thanks again for your input. I'll definitely change "how" to "when" in L4, as "how" clearly doesn't make sense Cheers for pointing that out, Bilbo, serge and Milo. xxx
"We believe that we invent symbols. The truth is that they invent us; we are their creatures, shaped by their hard, defining edges." - Gene Wolfe