Moving On

[allykat727]

I think justcloudy critiqued your piece perfectly. The meter is quite nice, but the concept and turns of words are very cliche. I'd suggest experimenting with words that evoke a deeper emotional response. Also, consider thinking of poetry as painting an image or scene loaded with these emotions. Let the turns of word reveal the story you've told above instead of stating it matter-of-factly. Thanks for the read